English is a rich language. One reason is that we don’t have an equivalent of l’Academie Française, which tries (and fails) to prevent loan words, neologisms, and deviations from prior rules of grammar.


Another reason is that political processes keep generating euphemisms designed to disguise horrid behavior. (“Did I say death camps? I meant happy camps.”)


To honor that tradition, I offer this list of euphemisms for theft:

Email me here with additional candidates.